Cricket and Yash Chopra films

A friend asked me if I had any idea how much Indian cricket was worth…it seemed that more than one TV executive was now ruing over having overpaid for the broadcast rights. We were lobbing emails back and forth discussing why Indians even bother to watch as much cricket as they do. We think that we might have an answer to that - and indirectly for how much the Indian cricket team is worth.

I had always found it a bit of a mystery how people; who otherwise quite intelligent, sane and sensible; managed to not just sit through yet another Yash Chopra film and actually manage to be entertained. I saw exactly two Yash Chopra films - no, make that three. The fairy tales were cringeworthy and never managed to surprise you except in how much more treacly they were than you could ever have imagined. All Yash Chopra films feature the following

• Boy
• Girl
• Parent(s) who don't like them getting hitched or, in an unusual twist for a Yash Chopra production, either of the parties who eventually get hitched not realizing their true feelings for each other
• Umpteen songs that all sound the same across films

Now onto India's similar obsession with cricket. Why do Indians love cricket? I believe that Indians don't like the game itself. Huh! You might do a double take at that statement. I strongly believe that to be true. Indians like cricket in almost as much as Englishmen, South Africans or Australians - which is to say that it comes slightly above chess and possibly somewhere below soccer (football in those parts of the world) or even rugby!

Indians watch cricket the same way a freshman who knows nothing about basketball or American football roots for his college team! They want a magical trip into an alternate reality that makes them forget their problems and where they have a happy ending ;-) No pun intended. Well, it is definitely unintentional though Freudians might say otherwise.

Ask the average Indian about what he thinks of the Indian team and his reply would probably be based on their most recent tour results. If they had won he'd be beaming from ear to ear and talk your ear off about how wonderful they are! If, god forbid, they had lost, then he'll tell you how these guys are a bunch of scumbags who don't deserve the huge paychecks that they earn. But he/ she will never pick out the strengths or weaknesses of a particular strategy used or discuss a particular player's strokes or bowling. These nuances of the game are lost on most people. They view it as a Yash Chopra production - pure entertainment with melodrama and a happy ending. A losing Indian team is viewed as a Yash Chopra film that somehow turned into a Lars Von Trier film. I'd be angry too if I paid for Lars Von Trier and ended up watching a Yash Chopra production. So I can see where they are coming from. Shoe on the other foot and all that rot...

Why do I think most Indians don't appreciate the finer parts of the game? Look at viewership statistics or even how closely most Indians follow different formats of the game. Test matches offer the best chance for purists to view the game at its best and where you see players face real tests of stamina, mental preparation and where game strategy plays a crucial role. The game unfolds slowly and yet can surprise you with breathtaking turns in the blink of an eye. The shorter formats progressively reduce the beauty but add intensity. You can't win a test match that lasts 5 days with batsmen employing golf methods. But you might actually be better off with such batsmen (employing the term loosely) in a Twenty-Twenty match that lasts 3 hours.

Maybe this is exactly why Indian players are such a demoralized lot. They are like tormented artists who have achieved commercial success but find that they've been made the toast of the town for all the wrong reasons. In this industry, like Wall Street, when the job becomes meaningless, all that counts is the size of your paycheck. Maybe the sheer popularity of the game in India is hastening its demise (well, at least make it unrecognizable).

Coming to valuations, since cricket in the subcontinent is all about television time, viewership and advertising, I think the best proxy is other content that has loyal viewership - soap operas. Balaji Telefilms and the Indian cricket team should be good company for each other ;-)