Excerpts from random mails

I've been in a funk for quite some time now. Think that I've been wallowing in selfpity and been whining long enough. Gotta get my act together again. Started out today with deciding to keep in touch with a lot of people I should have been in touch with. Also vowed that I'd start on my book.

I've been having some pretty good discussions (and monologues as well) through e-mail. Think that belongs here more than it does in my sent items. Would like to go through it again later, even after I quit this firm.

Me to a cousin in the US

"... Are you talking about whether you should come back? If you do come over, i'd say the only advantage is that you can live a very comfortable life here. Any kid who grows up in an upper-middle class family now parties and hangs around malls and chica bars. So if you think that coming back is going to ensure that Govind will grow up to be a cleancut guy like you, then i'd say that is iffy. I've seen 16 yr olds do coke here!!! But I think that they are in a minority, with most people becoming more and more health conscious. Coke is a fad here now. It is a statement that you are hep, and rich ;-)

On an aside, I really don't think there is anything wrong in today's kids growing up this way (i'm not talking abt doing drugs here). After all, even my generation leans towards this kind of a lifestyle, rather than anything that is remotely like what our parents had. Cocktails and wine over dinner is a given when you dine out nowadays. So is clubbing during weekends, even if people dance to Punjabi ;-) I rarely go clubbing myself, because I hate the music they play almost anywhere. Of course, people aren't very promiscous, and it is usually just a large gang of friends who go out clubbing - not really like a date, or as a pick-up joint"

My cousin's reply

"... The main issue I have here (meaning the US) is the School education system. I don't mind the clubbing , drinking etc as long as it doesn't affect you terribly. The number of choices for a teenager may be the actual problem here. A High school student in CA can choose between Music and Math, and according to me that is a terrible age to ask for an choice . A math genius at that age may always take math while that is not true for an average guy.

The Indian school system is really suited for an average Joe , so somebody with common sense and reasonable intelligence will end up with a good Degree . But here, an average Joe will mostly end up below average . I think I can prove this if we have the statistics on number of successful second generation Indians. Of course on a college level things are entirely different here.
Having said this , I think the school system here do have advantages - they have a very subjective approach to the problem . ( This proves that Americans are very talkative!)"

Me back to him

"You are right when you said that here (meaning India) an avg Joe (Joseph - kindly excuse the figure of speech if you ever happen to read this and feel insulted - btw you are no average guy) can't screw up too badly. Well, the system here is geared to produce avg. Joes out of everybody you put through it.

Have you ever known any Indian who is really good in his field and not had at least part of his education abroad? If I sound a bit critical about the system here, it is because I have been a victim - forced to learn by rote and reproduce - that is the way the tests here measure you - how much can you reproduce of what you've been taught. IIMK was the first place where I really liked the system. If all of Indian education were like that, then we'd start producing brilliant people who think beyond the ordinary, instead of this sea of avg Joes.

Like you said, it may be terrible to be faced with a choice at such an impressionable age where your only reason for taking Calculus over Literature may be this cute girl that you have had a crush on since forever ;-) But the good thing about the system there is that you can screw up and start changing whenever you make up your mind. You can be an Eco major on grad school without having touched Eco all your life. Here, things are not so easy. Once you fall into a slot, people try to push you into that pigeonhole. Never mind if you feel like a square peg in a round hole!!! And the system here is very unforgiving. I did screw up badly in 12th, and I've been hounded about that ever since. Cutoffs for interviews even at IIMK would sometimes be based on an 80% min in 10th and 12th. Have you ever heard of anything more ridiculous!!! For all you know, I might have done badly in those boards because of some personal reasons. That is the trouble with the system here. It doesn't allow for mavericks. "

ubergeek, the