Home

The last bend and there it would be before my eyes. I really don't know what I felt at that moment - anticipation for sure, but could i prefix that with 'eager'? Hardly! But it was familiar and comfortable. Like an old sneaker that you've broken in - looks ugly by now, but very comfortable. And sad to say, my first sight of home confirmed this - at least the ugly part. What had happened to the snowy white walls? They were now a canary yellow! I wondered if my parents had gone totally nuts. Or maybe they had become colorblind. Hmm...or maybe both.

After a night spent mostly in an airport lounge, and after having my contact lens solution confiscated by the airport security, and with having missed seeing off Mich, I was in a superbly lousy mood already. And in such a mood, what I wanted was something soothing. Something nice. Like shots out of a Tarkovsky movie. Not canary yellow walls.

But once inside, I was relieved. My old room was almost the same way I'd left it. Maybe a thin line of dust over everything. But that was reassuring. That meant that my mess was probably untouched. Nothing had been thrown out. Not like the first time I came back from undergrad school and found my whole cassette collection missing. Apparently mom decided that they were infested with ants and thought it better to throw away the whole lot. That took some time for me to register. I think that part of me died that day. Definitely a large part of my affection for mom did. And took a long time before it got back to where it was.

Usual big discussion about life in the kitchen with mom and dad. Took the opportunity to tell them that I smoke - occassionally. Explained about being a 'weekend smoker' and lit up. Dad stole cigarettes from me all weekend. Sigh. That meant I ran out of the pack that I'd brought along. And despite trying very hard to find some place that'd sell Cartier, never managed to. Everybody was out of stock. Maybe just as well. With just 4 fags a day, they already thought that I smoked too much. To think that it is usually a pack over the weekend!

Missed Mich. all the time. Kept my phone next to me all the time wondering when she'd call. As usual, she caught me in the shower. We usually never miss calling each other up at the exact moment the other person is taking a shower. Telepathy?

Sis fears that she is going to flunk out of my alma mater. Tried my best to convince her that she was probably among the best there is. For the last 15 years or so, ever since I became relegated to her shadow, I'd been trying to convince her that she is not half as smart as I am. Now I have to undo all those years of hard work of trying to persuade her about my superiority and convince her that she is as smart or smarter. Sounds familiar? Story of most of the things we do in our lives, isn't it?

I miss mom's cooking the way I used to miss exotic food. I love it - if it is occassional. Pigged out the 3 days I was home and ate all that I had planned on. Even went to the old gang's fave hangout - Mini Fast Food and had the best beef burgers I've ever had anywhere. Always fun going back.

After a tearful farewell at the airport, and a unusually bad flight later, when I got back to my apartment, strangely I felt that I'd gotten home. Maybe this is where home is for me now.

ubergeek, the